Bubble Boy's Oedipal War Broke 'Em, But Bubble Boy Won't Pay to Fix 'Em

More tales of incompetence and inexcusible stupidity about shabby, shoddy "treatment" for American troops with PTSD.

(Recommendations for fixing VA system, here. Earlier WaPo story here.)

The American military, led by raucous draft-dodger George W. Bush as its shining, sock-stuffed-codpiece commander, apparently just can't handle treating its own troops with PTSD now, even thought it's Bush's own Oedipal war that gave them their severe psychological injuries.

Every month, 20 to 40 soldiers are evacuated from Iraq because of mental problems, according to the Army. Most are sent to Walter Reed along with other war-wounded. For amputees, the nation's top Army hospital offers state-of-the-art prosthetics and physical rehab programs, and soon, a new $10 million amputee center with a rappelling wall and virtual reality center.

Nothing so gleaming exists for soldiers with diagnoses of post-traumatic stress disorder, who in the Army alone outnumber all of the war's amputees by 43 to 1. The Army has no PTSD center at Walter Reed, and its psychiatric treatment is weak compared with the best PTSD programs the government offers. Instead of receiving focused attention, soldiers with combat-stress disorders are mixed in with psych patients who have issues ranging from schizophrenia to marital strife.

Even though Walter Reed maintains the largest psychiatric department in the Army, it lacks enough psychiatrists and clinicians to properly treat the growing number of soldiers returning with combat stress. Earlier this year, the head of psychiatry sent out an "SOS" memo desperately seeking more clinical help.

Individual therapy with a trained clinician, a key element in recovery from PTSD, is infrequent, and targeted group therapy is offered only twice a week.

Here's the real deall:

1. Assess.
Assess symptomatology, and the level of risk to self and others.
2. Refer In or Out, then Treat.
High-risk patients (dangerous to self/others) go inpatient, receive individual counseling at least twice a week, med eval, groups with possible referral for psych eval. They stay inpatient until they are stabilized.
3. Assess again, Refer Again.
Patients assessed as suitable for outpatient treatment get individual sessions, twice a week to start if they're very symptomatic, once a week if that will suffice. Med eval referrals made by clinician as needed. Work toward stabilization of symptoms.
4. Add Groups. (Maybe.)
Once a patient is doing well (symptoms less severe/less frequent), add group treatment -- down the line. Don't start out with group treatment.


Earlier in this series, the writers suggested that "more research" needs to be done on PTSD before treatment can begin.
This is total bullshit. Effective treatments already exist, the military just is not using them.

If the military's not prepared to treat their own wounded, they need to refer their wounded troops for treatment to experienced trauma-trained clinicians.

They're ready, willing, and able.

Get it done. Make it happen.

Get it done.


vets with PTSD
support the troops

Happy 4th Birthday,"Mission Accomplished!"! You Must Feel So Proud of All You've Accomplished in Four Years, Must You Not?

WaPo here.

.
.
.
.















































Mission accomplished

General Eaton's Letter to President Bush on Veto
May 1, 2007

President George W. Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20500

Dear Mr. President,

Today, in your veto message regarding the bipartisan legislation just passed on Operation Iraqi Freedom, you asserted that you so decided because you listen to your commanders on the ground.

Respectfully, as your former commander on the ground, your administration did not listen to our best advice. In fact, a number of my fellow Generals were forced out of their jobs, because they did not tell you what you wanted to hear -- most notably General Eric Shinseki, whose foresight regarding troop levels was advice you rejected, at our troops' peril.

The legislation you vetoed today represented a course of action that is long overdue. This war can no longer be won by the military alone. We must bring to bear the entire array of national power - military, diplomatic and economic. The situation demands a surge in diplomacy, and pressure on the Iraqi government to fix its internal affairs. Further, the Army and Marine Corps are on the verge of breaking - or have been broken already - by the length and intensity of this war. This tempo is not sustainable - and you have failed to grow the ground forces to meet national security needs. We must begin the process of bringing troops home, and repairing and growing our military, if we are ever to have a combat-ready force for the long war on terror ahead of us.

The bill you rejected today sets benchmarks for success that the Iraqis would have to meet, and puts us on a course to redeploy our troops. It stresses the need for sending troops into battle only when they are rested, trained and equipped. In my view, and in the view of many others in the military that I know, that is the best course of action for our security.

As someone who served this nation for decades, I have the utmost respect for the office you hold. However, as a man of conscience, I could not sit idly by as you told the American people today that your veto was based on the recommendations of military men. Your administration ignored the advice of our military's finest minds before, and I see no evidence that you are listening to them now.

I urge you to reconsider your position, and work with Congress to pass a bill that achieves the goals laid out above.

Respectfully,

Major General Paul D. Eaton, USA, Retired

Official No Blood for Hubris Mental Health Interlude No. 2983

"Almost everybody in Washington is still calling for Alberto Gonzales to resign. President Bush said Gonzales' testimony last week increased his confidence in him. Bush said he'd had no idea Gonzales could lie like that." --Jay Leno

"Presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich introduced articles of impeachment against Vice President Dick Cheney. Do you know what would happen if Cheney was impeached? George Bush would become acting president." --Jay Leno

"Reviews of Gonzales' performance were mixed. 99.99% of the people who saw it felt he embarrassed himself. The other .01% was this guy [on screen: Pres. Bush]" --Jon Stewart

"In the wake of his disastrous performance before the Senate Judiciary Committee, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales maintains that he still won't resign. ... Really, Alberto Gonzales? You're not going to resign? ...

During the hearings, you said 'I don't remember' or ' I don't recall' over 50 times. Don't lawyers need to have good memories? ... I'd rather have the guy from 'Memento' as a lawyer. My Commodore 64 has more memory than you, and it runs on bong water.

Even the most conservative senators think you should resign. Sam Brownback thinks you should resign, and he's so conservative, he thinks watching 'Will and Grace' gives you AIDS" --Seth Meyers

"Really, President Bush? You think [the Gonzales testimony] went well? Which part? Because the best thing anyone can say about Gonzales' testimony was that he didn't use the word 'nappy,' and he remembered to wear pants." --Amy Poehler

"Over in Washington, Alberto Gonzales testified yesterday before Congress. He is the Sanjaya of the Bush administration. He had a month to rehearse and he still sucked." --Bill Maher

"After weeks of mock testimony, there you have it. Alberto Gonzales doesn't know what happened, but he assures you, what he doesn't remember was handled properly." --Jon Stewart

"The Bush administration extended the tours of Army troops in Iraq by three months, increasing their stay to a total of 15 months. Troops responded to the news, saying, 'I'm gay.'" --Amy Poehler

"The White House said today that they have lost the e-mails requested by congressional investigators -- e-mails that may have dealt with the firing of those eight federal prosecutors. They lost them. Today the administration assured Americans that they are not corrupt, just incompetent." --Jay Leno

"Republican candidate Mitt Romney says that Hillary Clinton is wrong when she says it takes a village to raise a child. But when Hillary's book came out, Romney said Hillary was right and it does take a village to raise a child. For a lifelong hunter, this guy sure shoots himself in the foot a lot." --Jay Leno

"Because of the storms back East, over 250,000 people still without power. In fact, it was so bad in Washington, D.C., Attorney General Alberto Gonzales had to resort to destroying e-mails by hand." --Jay Leno

"President Bush picked [Iraq war architect Paul] Wolfowitz to head the World Bank in 2005. His mission? Use its mighty financial resources to raise the living standards of people around the world. His first beneficiary? Well, his girlfriend.

Last week it was disclosed that Wolfowitz had used his influence to get a promotion and a raise for his long-time paramour, World Bank employee Shaha Ali Riza -- considered to be a foremost expert on the Middle East. Which means -- you know what they say -- opposites attract." --Jon Stewart

Bush jokes
worst president ever

Say, Why DO They Call Him "Preznit Toad-Exploder," Anyhow?

Why do they call George W. Bush, "Preznit Toad-Exploder"?

Well, impressionable American boys and girls, it's like this.

It's sort of like calling James "Dogbeater" Dobson "Kiddie-Whipper Dobson."

Or calling him "Dogbeater Dobson" for that matter.

Well, besides Bubble Boy's actual childhood sadistic sentient-being-intentional-suffering-and-death-causing toad-exploding history, there's, you know, stuff like this: LEGAL EXPERT: BUSH MAY HAVE ORDERED TORTURE.

Via RawStory:

The administration has been almost pathological in trying to find ways to keep these people from ever seeing a real judge or a real lawyer," Jonathan Turley, a law professor at George Washington University, told the Associated Press, "and the reasons are obvious."

Turley, among many legal analysts, believes that the likelihood that torture tactics were used on the detainees has heightened the administration's state of secrecy for fear of public retribution. The law professor also suggested that President Bush not only knew about the torture program but may have ordered it.

"It seems pretty clear that they've been tortured," Turley told the AP, "and that the president knew they were being tortured, and may have even ordered their torture through techniques like 'water boarding'."

More here, about Bush ordering torture in Iraq at Abu Ghraib -- and it ain't pretty.

Bush
Iraq War Vets
Vets with PTSD

Official No Blood for Hubris Mental Health Interlude No. Eleventy-Twelve

"Yesterday, I. Lewis Libby, a.k.a. 'The Scooter', the vice president's chief of staff found guilty on four of five counts ranging from obstruction of justice to lying to a grand jury. Yes, we got the guy -- the one-man cancer on this White House has been removed." --Jon Stewart

"Obviously, this has come at a bad time for the White House. Usually, you want the conviction of a high-ranking official and the veterans-sleeping-in-moldy-rat-holes stories on different days." --Jon Stewart

"The White House feels very strongly this is yet another case of activist jurors destroying the lives of the disabled. These $5-a-day zealots were determined to put a man in jail just because a few details slipped his feeble mind." --Daily Show correspondent Samantha Bee

"This whole scandal came to light when Robert Novak became the first person to publish details outing the CIA operative. And it really would be a shame if amidst all the legal wrangling and the heated words about this case we lost sight of the one essential truth that I think all parties can agree on: Bob Novak is a HUGE douche bag." --Jon Stewart

"In the Valerie Plame case, Scooter Libby was found not guilty . . . on one of the five charges. . . . But the media is instead focusing, of course, on the four counts of perjury, lying to the FBI and obstruction of justice for which Libby was convicted. It's typical. They always see the glass as 80% guilty." --Stephen Colbert

"We have received word that many hundreds of American troops are being held in deplorable, squalid conditions. What kind of people would treat our soldiers in this horrible manner? Funny story -- turns out, it's us.

In a bombshell story, the Washington Post has reported that several buildings at the military's Walter Reed Medical Center are so poorly maintained that they are pits riddled with water damage, black mold, and in the case of the notorious Building 18, rampant infestation of cockroaches and rodents at Walter Reed. I can understand this kind of thing if you were running, I don't know, some kind of fast-food restaurant. Or, let's say, a hospital for cockroaches that had been injured in some kind of vermin battle.

"Why aren't we hearing the other side of this issue? Yes, there is tons of black mold growing in the walls where we house our wounded soldiers. But nobody mentions, mold can be used to make cheese . . . and penicillin. You might say Walter Reed's walls are dripping with medicine." --Jon Stewart

"The president has said no one supports the troops more than him. So, if you take him at his word -- and I see no reason not to -- anyone leaving the army is necessarily going into a less supportive environment, and that can't be an easy transition. . . . [These shoddy conditions] are a halfway house, so that soldiers can get accustomed to their terrifying, new Bushless world. You just can't throw them back to their family and friends, where God knows what will happen to them. You need to ease them into it with six months to a year of squalid aftercare in some type of bureaucratic limbo" --Daily Show correspondent John Oliver

"Those brave Americans who put themselves in harm's way. . . . I'm talking, of course, about the members of Congress who toured Walter Reed last week. Someone had to have the courage to walk through that hospital and then have the press document their disapproval. These folks have been fighting to improve the conditions for our wounded soldiers ever since the very beginning of two weeks ago." --Stephen Colbert

"It's hard for us civilians to understand the kind of sacrifice it takes for a congressman to respond to a Washington Post article, so let me put this into perspective for you: They can't just look out their window to see what's happening at Walter Reed. No, they have to get into a car. Walter Reed hospital is more than six miles from the Capitol. . . . Getting to Walter Reed from the Capitol is a march through hell, one that evidently takes more than four years to make" --Stephen Colbert

The War on Science -- TALIBANGELICALS SUPPRESS AGE OF GRAND CANYON

The continuing Talibangelical fundamentalist war on science, courtesy of the Bushist fascists.

Watch out, kids. It's book-burning time!


HOW OLD IS THE GRAND CANYON? PARK SERVICE WON’T SAY — Orders to Cater to Creationists Makes National Park Agnostic on Geology

Washington, DC — Grand Canyon National Park is not permitted to give an official estimate of the geologic age of its principal feature, due to pressure from Bush administration appointees. Despite promising a prompt review of its approval for a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah's flood rather than by geologic forces, more than three years later no review has ever been done and the book remains on sale at the park, according to documents released today by Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER).

"In order to avoid offending religious fundamentalists, our National Park Service is under orders to suspend its belief in geology," stated PEER Executive Director Jeff Ruch. "It is disconcerting that the official position of a national park as to the geologic age of the Grand Canyon is ‘no comment.’"

In a letter released today, PEER urged the new Director of the National Park Service (NPS), Mary Bomar, to end the stalling tactics, remove the book from sale at the park and allow park interpretive rangers to honestly answer questions from the public about the geologic age of the Grand Canyon. PEER is also asking Director Bomar to approve a pamphlet, suppressed since 2002 by Bush appointees, providing guidance for rangers and other interpretive staff in making distinctions between science and religion when speaking to park visitors about geologic issues.

In August 2003, Park Superintendent Joe Alston attempted to block the sale at park bookstores of Grand Canyon: A Different View by Tom Vail, a book claiming the Canyon developed on a biblical rather than an evolutionary time scale. NPS Headquarters, however, intervened and overruled Alston. . . .

Ironically, in 2005, two years after the Grand Canyon creationist controversy erupted, NPS approved a new directive on “Interpretation and Education (Director’s Order #6) which reinforces the posture that materials on the "history of the Earth must be based on the best scientific evidence available, as found in scholarly sources that have stood the test of scientific peer review and criticism [and] Interpretive and educational programs must refrain from appearing to endorse religious beliefs explaining natural processes."

“As one park geologist said, this is equivalent of Yellowstone National Park selling a book entitled Geysers of Old Faithful: Nostrils of Satan,” Ruch added, pointing to the fact that previous NPS leadership ignored strong protests from both its own scientists and leading geological societies against the agency approval of the creationist book."

Down with Medievalism. Shame.



Full story here.

Power & Control Abuser Bush Insults Senator Webb & His Marine Son (Then WH Spreads That Smear All Around Like Bushist Fascist Holiday Cheer)

It was bad enough when Bubble Boy was caught talking with his mouth full.

It was worse when he was caught chewing with his mouth open. Feh.

It was even worse when he was caught sexually harrassing the female Chancellor of Germany, Angela Merkel. (As if she were his pet cow, he came up on her from behind, touching her, touching her without permission, then flounced off as if nothing had happened, to minimize his invasion of another person's physical boundaries. When was the last time Bush gave Poison Putin an unwanted touch? Or Kofi Annan? Ahmadinejad?)

The worst of all was when was Bush was caught -- without any WMDs.
600K dead, no WMDs, oops, sorry.

Bush is always getting caught with his pants down, one way or another, is he not?

This time, Bush was caught trying to exert power and control over the free speech of a newly-elected Senator, one whose own son is now serving in Iraq.

(Unlike Preznit Toad-Exploder's two adult daughters, neither of whom is serving in Iraq, and both of whom remain unemployed slackers at age 25, never having had a real job in their whole lives, just like their bio dad, Dubya.)

It's not pretty.

"How's your boy?" Bush asks, referring to Senator Webb's adult son, a Marine who is now serving in Iraq.

"I'd like to get 'em out of Iraq, Mr. President," Webb responds.

"That's not what I asked you!" Bush snaps. "I said, how's your boy?"


From The Hill:

At a private reception held at the White House with newly elected lawmakers shortly after the election, Bush asked Webb how his son, a Marine lance corporal serving in Iraq, was doing.

Webb responded that he really wanted to see his son brought back home, said a person who heard about the exchange from Webb.

"I didn’t ask you that, I asked how he’s doing," Bush retorted, according to the source.

Webb confessed that he was so angered by this that he was tempted to slug the commander-in-chief, reported the source, but . . . didn’t. . .

A White House spokeswoman declined to give Bush’s version of the conversation.

The horror! The horror!

Sieg heil, we are sorry, we know we must all obey dear fearless leader Preznit Snippy and endure all his divine tyrant temper tantrums and all his unchecked divine megalomania, because he "is" so importantly, our great divine Deciderer, Our Sole Preznit Toad-Exploder. (Depending upon what "is," is.)

Although we are those who must shed our blood to defend free speech, we know we must never ever seek to exercise it, particularly not when we are In The Presence, nor may we ever deviate from the Divine Script.

Next, shall we not be much more careful to be shuffling out of His Presence backwards, whilst bowing? Why, we must ask Helen Mirren what is to be done!

Why, oh why, aren't we treating George Bush properly, as King-Emperor, right now, why, O you librul traitors, why, eh?

Oh, and please spread this story around, media whore media, at closet cupcake Karl Rove's behest, so everyone knows that punishment follows lese majeste.

Well, Karl, you know, sometimes what follows that kind of Bush's War on Democracy Bushist fascist stuff is like, other stuff, like, well, tar & feathers, & offering indictments.

Probably not therapy.


Bush and Webb
Bush rude to Sen. Webb
Iraq War

Update: here's George Will, being stupid and defending the indefensible Bush. One was deeply touched when Will read the riot act to Cheney, after the VP told Senator Jeffords to go fuck himself, was one not?
Update 2: WH deliberately pushed Webb smear, from Editor & Publisher, via RawStory, here.

Iraq = Bush's Botched Joke

What's so funny about Iraq, Bubble Boy's botched joke?

Nothing.

Seems way less funny than his famed knee-slapper where he crawled around on all fours, looking under furniture, not finding those pesky WMDs.

Maybe it's time, you know, not to elect dyslexic megalomaniac cheerleaders as President. Maybe it's time to, you know, stop Khmer-Rouge-esquely dumping on the intelligent for being intelligent, and start dumping on morons for being morons.

I'm ready to return to leaders with foresight that actually works.

Any Republicans out there with a conscience? Anyone feeling bad about the actions of your selected/elected moron fearful fearless leader?

The one who's led America into moral and fiscal bankruptcy? The one who promotes torture, while gutting habeas corpus? The one with zero respect for the rule of law?

You should. You bought him, he broke it. All of it.

Abu Ghraib, Gitmo.

Haditha.

Katrina.

Iraq.

Who will be the last to die for Bush's botched joke?



Robert Gates
Bush's botched joke
worst president ever
Iraq Study Group

Here's Why Bush Should Not Have Cut and Run from Afghanistan: Teacher of Girls Disembowelled

Too bad that our boy Bubble Boy refused to concentrate on Afghanistan and finish the job.

But then, Toad-Exploder's always had a soft spot for the Afghan Taliban, has he not? He hosted them so very charmingly in Texas, while they were the world's acknowledged leaders in oppressing women.

Impelled by his overwhelming oedipal issues, George W. Bush cut and ran from Afghanistan, leaving our actual enemy Osama Bin Laden alive, and leaving the Taliban strong enough there to work over time to retake the country.

In service of that aim, the Taliban now are free to do this:


Disembowelled, then torn apart: The price of daring to teach girls
Ghazni, Afghanistan

The gunmen came at night to drag Mohammed Halim away from his home, in front of his crying children and his wife begging for mercy.

The 46-year-old schoolteacher tried to reassure his family that he would return safely. But his life was over, he was part-disembowelled and then torn apart with his arms and legs tied to motorbikes, the remains put on display as a warning to others against defying Taliban orders to stop educating girls.

Mr Halim was one of four teachers killed in rapid succession by the Islamists at Ghazni, a strategic point on the routes from Kabul to the south and east which has become the scene of fierce clashes between the Taliban and US and Afghan forces.

The day we arrived, an Afghan policemen and eight insurgents died during an ambush in an outlying village. Rockets were found, primed to be fired into Ghazni City during a visit by the American ambassador a few days previously.

But, as in the rest of Afghanistan, it is the civilians who are bearing the brunt of this conflict. At the village of Qara Bagh, the family of Mr Halim are distraught and terrified. His cousin, Ahmed Gul, shook his head: "They killed him like an animal. No, no. We do not kill animals like that, it would be haram. They took away a father and a husband, they had no pity. We are all very worried. Please go now, you see those men standing over there? They are watching. It is dangerous for you, and for us."

Fatima Mushtaq, the director of education at Ghazni, has had repeated death threats, the notorious "night letters". Her gender, as well as her refusal to send girls home from school, has made her a particular source of hatred for Islamist zealots.

"I think they killed him that way to frighten us, otherwise why make a man suffer so much? Mohammed Halim and his family were good friends of ours and we are very, very upset by what has happened. He came to me when the threats first began and asked what he should do. I told him to move somewhere safe. I think he was trying to arrange that when they came and took him," she said.

The threats against Ms Mushtaq also extend to her husband, Sayyid Abdul, and their eight children. "When the first letters arrived, I tried to hide them from my husband," she said. But then he found the next few. He said we must stand together. We talked, and we decided that we must tell the children. So that they can be prepared, but it is not a good way for them to grow up."

Ms Mushtaq is familiar with the ways of the Taliban. During their rule she and her sister ran secret schools for girls at their home. The Taliban beat them for teaching the girls algebra.

Link via The Independent here.


cut and run
Taliban
teacher disembowelled

Dirty Bush to Vets: First We Maim Your Minds, Then We Dump You

No surprises, really. An administration that cuts taxes for rich folks and cuts corners for regular military folks, letting troops risking their lives go into battle without armor. Body armor, armor for vehicles; hey, dudes, you know, you have to invade countries that didn't invade you with the armor you have, not the armor you wish you had.

Now, finally cognizant that they've pissed away the Clinton surplus with their psychotic tax-cuts and no-tax-just-spendism, the Dirty Bushists are trying to balance the budget on the backs of psych-maimed vets.

Wow. Nice one.

Here's the technique: you take "another look" at your current military veterans who have been diagnosed with post-traumatic-stress disorder (you know, that thing that often happens when a guy or gal spends a lot of time watching buddies explode into masses of blood and guts, watching innocent civilians explode into shreds and piles of blood and guts, eye-witnessing various categories of human beings being slaughtered freely so they leave little indelible pieces of their brain and skin on your uniform and on your mind-stream, and so on).

Next, you try to CUT OFF as many of these suffering vets as possible from benefits, such as receiving disability pay and receiving standard of care psychological treatment for PTSD (you know, the kind of treatment which could cure their suffering).

How do you cut them off from benefits? Why, you cleverly "un-diagnose" them. You just move them from one column to the next. You say, your symptoms, debilitating as they are, just AREN'T enough as of today, so we now say, you're fine, just fine, we just don't give a shit. We don't care.

[post-Cindy-at-Crawford update: aha. A true Bushist leitmotif: We don't care! We don't care! We don't care! And, you know, they actually don't!]

Deal with it, major dudes. Commit suicide, homicide, who cares, tough nuts, it's all your fault if you're all fucked up now. Once you're dead, or in jail, we don't have to pay for your psychotherapy anymore. Heh, heh.

Isn't that charming? Isn't that just the way to save a buck?

There's more at Salon:


"Outraged vets say . . . plan is a callous attempt to cuts the costs of an increasingly expensive war."


Easy to sum up the Dirty Bushists: heartless, brainless, soulless.






Bush
Vets with PTSD
Vets
Rumsfeld

Faux Faulkner Winner Rips Bush A Southern-Fried New One

Samsara. It's a bitch. What a bitch. Bombs, bombings, bombers, blood for oil, neo-con crazies in total charge, driving us deeper and deeper into moral and fiscal bankruptcy.

And yet, somehow, we find reasons to live. Lush heirloom tomatoes with funny names. The opportunity to rescue an ant in a sink. A good pond-swim, or bay-swim, or spindrift ocean dip. Jon Stewart, when available. Cilantro shrimp on the barbie. A drooling Newfie. A ginger Altoid.

A really funny Faulkner parody--that treats the Bushist fascists as inbred Yokwnapatawphans, sorta. No offence meant to the inbred.



Update--here's the story, since the link no longer works.



"The Administration and the Fury-- If William Faulkner Were Writing on the Bush White House."

By Sam Apple

Down the hall, under the chandelier, I could see them talking. They were walking toward me and Dick's face was white, and he stopped and gave a piece of paper to Rummy, and Rummy looked at the piece of paper and shook his head. He gave the paper back to Dick and Dick shook his head. They disappeared and then they were standing right next to me.

"Georgie's going to walk down to the Oval Office with me," Dick said.

"I just hope you got him all good and ready this time," Rummy said.

"Hush now," Dick said. "This aint no laughing matter. He know lot more than folks think."

Dick patted me on the back good and hard. "Come on now, Georgie," Dick said. "Never mind you, Rummy."

We walked down steps to the office. There were paintings of old people on the walls and the room was round like a circle and Condi was sitting on my desk. Her legs were crossed.

"Did you get him ready for the press conference?" Dick said.

"Dont you worry about him. He'll be ready," Condi said. Condi stood up from the desk. Her legs were long and she smelled like the Xeroxed copies of the information packets they give me each day.

"Hello Georgie," Condi said. "Did you come to see Condi?" Condi rubbed my hair and it tickled.

"Dont go messing up his hair," Dick said. "He's got a press conference in a few minutes."

Condi wiped some spit on her hand and patted down my hair. Her hand was soft and she smelled like Xerox copies coming right out of the machine. "He looks just fine," Condi said.

Fine day, isn't it, Georgie, Daddy said. Daddy was pitching horseshoes. Horseshoes flew through the air and it was hot. Jeb looked at me. Stand back or one of his horseshoes is going to hit you and knock you down real good, Jeb said. Jeb threw the horseshoe and it went right over the stick and Daddy clapped. Run and get me that horseshoe, Georgie, Daddy said. I ran and picked up the horseshoe. The metal was hot in my hands, and I held it for a little bit and then I dropped it. I picked it up. It was hot in my hands and I started running away from Daddy and Jeb. Come back with that horseshoe, Daddy said. I was running as fast as I could. Jeb run after him and get me my horseshoe before he throws another one in the river, Daddy hollered. Jeb was chasing after me fast. Come back with that horseshoe, Georgie, Jeb hollered. But I was fast and I kept running until I got to the river. Dont you dare throw that horseshoe in the river, Jeb said. I threw the horseshoe in the river. Jeb fell on the ground. Jeb kicked and cried and then I cried.

"He needs his makeup," Dick said.

"I'll do it," Condi said. She put a little brush on my cheek and it tickled and I laughed.

Rummy walked into the room. "Jesus, what's he laughing about," Rummy said.

"Dont you pay attention to him, Georgie," Dick said. "They're going to be asking you all about Social Security. You just remember what we talked about."

"He cant remember anything," Rummy said.

I started to holler. Dick's face was red and he looked at Rummy. "I told you to hush up already," Dick said. "Now look what you've gone and done."

"Go and get him Saddam's gun," Condi said. "You know how he likes to hold it."

Dick went to my desk drawer and took out Saddam's gun. He gave it to me, and it was hot in my hands. Rummy pulled the gun away.

"Do you want him carrying a gun into the press conference?" Rummy said. "Cant you think any better than he can?"

I was hollering and Dick was turning red and then white and the room was tilted.

"You give him that gun back, right this minute," Condi said. Rummy gave me Saddam's gun back and I held it my hands. It was hot like a horseshoe.

"You got the gun, now you stop that hollering," Rummy said.

Condi patted me on the back. "It sure is hot in here," she said. She fanned herself and took off her jacket. She smelled like perfume.